Definition of a good mom?

I have been contemplating and wondering a lot lately if I was going to be a good mom. How would I measure a good mom? Will I be protective enough? Nurturing enough? Caring enough?

Last night (or early this morning) at around 2:15 a.m. my ever vigilant watch dog, Keefer sounded the alarm. With his four paws trying to gain traction as fast as he could on our wood floor and his deep gutteral bark, he made his way out the doggy door and to the bottom of our river birch. I sleepily awoke and slowly made my way to the sliding glass door and commanded him in. He came at once, like a good dog should and I immediately blocked the door so he and Bailey couldn't get out.

Once I had the yard secure, I grabbed our dilapidated ladder and placed it under the tree. I was going to climb and get the bird feeders out of the tree and go back to bed...or so I thought. I heard a lot of commotion in the tree and that caused me to pause. I immediately went back inside, woke up my 15 1/2 year old niece, Monica from her coma and asked her for her assistance. We both went back outside, this time armed with the spot light. I shined the light into the middle of the tree and was immediately mooned by two little raccoon butts. Monica was in charge of spotting the animals while I climbed the ladder to rescue our 4 bird feeders. Inside we went and back to sleep was the idea.

I decided to wait and watch for a minute to ensure the raccoons exited our yard with haste. I waited, and waited and waited. Finally I saw a dark lump moving across an even darker yard. I shined the spot light and saw one raccoon climb the fence...and stop. Why wasn't it running away after it had been spotted?? This raccoon sat on the fence contemplating whether to jump down the other side or stay on top. Why??? Finally the indecisive raccoon exited the yard and I thought was gone.

1 down, 1 to go. Should I go to bed or wait? I waited...and saw another dark figure slinking down the tree...and back up again. What?!?!?!?!? Leave our yard!!! Please!!! For the love of God I'm tired and would really like for my vicious beagle to be quiet!!! Something in the back of our yard caught my eye so I sent the beam of spotlight that direction. Could it be???? Is that the raccoon that just left our yard? Why is it hiding in the evergreen that hangs over our fence? Why is it still staring at our tree??? Then I understood. This was a momma raccoon and the two raccoon butts were her babies. So 3 total in our tree. Okay. I'll turn off all the lights and try to get our watch dogs to leave them alone so they feel comfortable enough to leave. No luck. For whatever reason the babies didn't want to come down. They would climb down and run back up the tree. Perhaps it was the dogs or maybe it was the crazy biped with the bright light that kept them confused and in the tree. Regardless of all the commotion, dogs barking and jumping at the windows, bright lights in eyes, I saw a dark lump lurking across the yard from our evergreen. Are you kidding me? Momma raccoon wanted to make sure her babies got down from the tree and were safe. Even with all the dogs and crazy humans. Amazing!!! I had to turn our front porch light on just to make sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing. Even with Keefer, our 85 pound lab mix trying to get out to chase them away the momma continued in her quest to make it to the bottom of the tree. I had to know where the babies were so I shined the spotlight in the tree and low and behold, there were 4 baby raccoons climbing on one another at the bottom crook of our tree. Finally, momma raccoon was at the bottom and slowly each little baby decided to climb head first down the tree. 4 babies were on the ground and momma was leading the way to the back of the yard for the cover of the evergreen. I had to watch their exit and was actually touched by the sight of a larger, mother raccoon leading 4 babies to safety. The line of 5 raccoons running across the yard and over the fence made me smile and feel good that everything ended up alright.

I climbed back in bed and noticed it was 3 something in the morning. I'm tired but feel blessed, is that the right word, to have been a part of this event.

Can I be a vigilant mother like the raccoon momma? Can I be as nurturing or caring? Will my safety matter if my offspring were in trouble? I can't answer that right now but I'd like to believe that I can be a good of a mother as this momma raccoon is. Nature has taught me so many things, little did I know it would be an example of how a mother should be.

24 Weeks old!!!

How do you say happy birthday to something that hasn't been born yet. For 24 weeks I've been trying to figure out a phrase to congratulate the Peanut for his/her weekly milestone. Nothing has really pleased me...

So yesterday I was working and I have a binder on my tummy to refer to. All of a sudden I felt a flutter in my belly and I SWEAR that that flutter made my binder move. Seriously!!!

I'm going to digress a bit to the whole birth 'plan' post from before.

So I looked up the definition of plan. Merriam-Webster online says the definition of 'plan' is 1: a drawing or diagram drawn on a plane: as a: a top or horizontal view of an object b: a large-scale map of a small area 2 a: a method for achieving an end b: an often customary method of doing something : procedure c: a detailed formulation of a program of action d: goal, aim3: an orderly arrangement of parts of an overall design or objective4: a detailed program (as for payment or the provision of some service)

Based on that definition and the fact that EVERYONE says we need a 'plan' but that this 'plan' is going to more than likely CHANGE...I have decided to call it our 'Birth Idea'. Apparently a true 'plan' is out of the question.

OH!!! I don't think I ever signed up for the whole belly button is going to change shapes! What in the world is THAT all about??? Holy Moly. How did I find this out you might ask. Well, oddly enough I was washing my belly and obviously the button is part of the belly washing. My finger went in and all of a sudden it didn't feel like MY belly button anymore. It's a foreign hole in the middle of my fast-growing belly. So now the question I ask myself is this, will my belly button ever be my belly button again?

When people told us life was going to change...they weren't kidding!!!

A Birthing Plan....yeah right

Are you people serious?? You want us to come up with a birthing plan??? I can hardly plan my day yet it seems that having a birthing plan is the way to go.

Let's go through the idea of a birthing plan. We have to have a bag ready. Okay, I can see how that will come in handy. Throw a pair of undies and a bra that no longer fits into a bag. Makes sense. The hospital will provide an outfit or two right? But we have to pack for a bundle of joy that isn't here yet. So we're supposed to know what the Peanut is going to need? I know a diaper...duh. I have heard of people who buy special "coming home" outfits. Yeah...I doubt that is going to be part of our birth plan. So a onesie (is that how you spell that????) and a dress if it's a girl and a football uniform if its a boy. Got it. Do they make shoulder pads that small? I'm certain a mini helmet will fit won't it?

Also, we're supposed to know what route we're going to take to the hospital. Why is that important to me? I'm not driving! I'll probably be pointing out every little thing the driver isn't doing right in my expert opinion but I won't be driving...at least I hope I won't be.

What else have they said about this wonderful idea of a "PLAN"? Oh....make a plan but allow for some leaway. Then what's the point in a plan??!??!! My idea of a plan is my idea. Why should I have to allow for changes in my/our plan??? Changes to my plan is going to make childbirth that much more painful. Oh the joy....

Its been too long...

Sorry for the delay in blogging. It seems that Chemistry, Lab and work have become the number one priority in life these days. 7 weeks left...I hope I can make it.

Wednesday we met with our doulah, Jordan to get a high level overview of her philosophy, etc. We knew we wouldn't be disappointed and of course we were not. Jordan seems to have thought of everything that we wanted to ask but didn't think about asking. She will be with us during delivery and will wear whatever hat she needs to to ensure things go the way we want when Peanut decides to arrive in the world. We are very excited to be working with her.

Friday we toured Research Hospital's Labor and Delivery unit and I think we were impressed with their new digs. They have a Level 3 NICU (God forbid we'd have to use it) but that seems to be a little more reassuring for Kristin and myself. They also have this cool VIP package that would allow us to receive a larger room, food for Kristin whenever I received food as well as some other niceties. We are probably going to 'upgrade' to that if we choose Research as our delivery hospital.

Saturday we are going to tour NKC hospital and see what they have to offer us. We have an 11:00 appointment and are walking in the Relay for Life on Friday night/Saturday morning. Needless to say I may be tired and grumpy. :o) I think I know which hospital we want to go to but we' re keeping our options open until all of the tours are complete.

Until later...take care